The BobboSphere: Don't believe everything you think.

I'm always amused by the business press "tips" on survival in the workplace. They usually include a few obvious common sense ideas that only the most oblivious worker would miss. They then mix this into a toxic swill of subservient demeaning behavior that only makes American workplaces more  stressful.

Here's an example of what I mean from a book called 30 Ways to Shine as a New Employee by Denise Bissonette.

1. Company get-togethers are not the place to relax and say what you really think of the company health plan, your workload, or your boss's new haircut. Use good judgment inside and outside the company!
2. Never complain about your boss to your co-workers or to someone in another department. Find a way to bring your complaint to your boss directly.
3. Stay out of people's personal business and avoid fighting other people's battles.
4. Accept that if your boss or supervisor thinks something is important, you should treat it like it is.
5. Never pass on to other people what someone tells you in confidence— even if they didn't ask you to keep it secret.
6. When others complain about a boss or co-worker, don't add fuel to the fire. It would be smarter to somehow change the subject.
7. Don't take things—even little things— from work. It is stealing.
8. Never ridicule anyone, even as a joke or to make a point, even if he or she laughs too. Avoid telling jokes or stories that could offend someone even if the person is not present.  It could get back to them or offend someone who is present!
9. Question authority, but question it to yourself until you have some authority.

This describes the dream workplace-----if you are the CEO who is doing the dreaming. It's a corporate utopia where people are afraid to discuss any issues  with each other and generally keep their damned mouths shut except to exchange vapid pleasantries.

A few of the points Ms. Bissonette makes are sensible, For example, #7 about not stealing from the company. But what worker is so dumb that they think stealing is a good strategy for career advancement?

I guess we're not only supposed to be sheep, but exceptionally stupid sheep as well. Oh wait, I'm not supposed to ridicule anyone. Apologies to any sheep who are reading this.

Maybe the idea is to throw in a few truisms to make the rest of it  more believable.

Personally, I prefer the approach suggested by the cartoon. Create a workplace environment where people can defend themselves in such a way that solves problems, not sweeps them under the corporate rug.

That requires a workplace environment where people expect respect not only from management, but from one another. You can't have a decent work enviroment unless people can speak freely.  That requires a supportive democratic culture where frank disagreements can be handled in a mature fashion.

Of course democracy takes a lot of practice and thought. It requires an active informed citizenry and in the workplace that means being a member of a  union.

There, he said it. The "U" word. The "F" word  gets­ you in less trouble in today's Orwellian business world.

Unions are not insurance policies that you buy and forget about until you have a problem. Being groups of very fallible human beings (you know----like your co-workers), a good union takes time and effort to build and maintain.

Once you have that kind of work environment, you can defend yourself against  injustice with the knowledge that your co-workers will stand by you.

All for one and one for all. It worked for the Three Musketeers didn't it?